Some of my favorite people...I recieved this in a email from my Auntie Dixie and I wanted to share it with you.
Game show responses...........
Some of us are even old enough to remember this old TV program.
If you remember the Original Hollywood Squares and its comics, this may bring a tear to your eyes.
These great questions and answers are from the days when "Hollywood Squares" game show responses were spontaneous and clever, not scripted and (often) dull, as they are now.
Peter Marshall was the host asking the questions, of course.
Q. Do female frogs croak?
A. Paul Lynde: If you hold their little heads under water long enough.
Q. If you're going to make a parachute jump, at least how high should you be?
A. Charley Weaver: Three days of steady drinking should do it.
Q. True or False, a pea can last as long as 5,000 years.
A. George Gobel: Boy, it sure seems that way sometimes.
Q. You've been having trouble going to sleep. Are you probably a man or a woman?
A. Don Knotts: That's what's been keeping me awake.
Q. According to Cosmopolitan, if you meet a stranger at a party and you think that he is attractive, is it okay to come out and ask him if he's married?
A. Rose Marie: No; wait until morning.
Q. Which of your five senses tends to diminish as you get older?
A. Charley Weaver: My sense of decency.
Q. In Hawaiian, does it take more than three words to say "I Love You"?
A. Vincent Price: No, you can say it with a pineapple and a twenty.
Q. What are "Do It," "I Can Help," and "I Can't Get Enough"?
A. George Gobel: I don't know, but it's coming from the next apartment.
Q. As you grow older, do you tend to gesture more or less with your hands while talking?
A. Rose Marie: You ask me one more growing old question Peter, and I'll give you a gesture you'll never forget.
Q. Paul, why do Hell's Angels wear leather?
A. Paul Lynde: Because chiffon wrinkles too easily.
Q. Charley, you've just decided to grow strawberries. Are you going to get any during the first year?
A. Charley Weaver: Of course not, I'm too busy growing strawberries.
Q. In bowling, what's a perfect score?
A. Rose Marie: Ralph, the pin boy.
Q. It is considered in bad taste to discuss two subjects at nudist camps. One is politics, what is the other? A. Paul Lynde: Tape measures.
Q. During a tornado, are you safer in the bedroom or in the closet?
A. Rose Marie: Unfortunately Peter, I'm always safe in the bedroom.
Q. Can boys join the Camp Fire Girls?
A. Marty Allen: Only after lights out.
.
Q. When you pat a dog on its head he will wag his tail . What will a goose do?
A. Paul Lynde: Make him bark?
Q. If you were pregnant for two years, what would you give birth to?
A. Paul Lynde: Whatever it is, it would never be afraid of the dark.
Q. According to Ann Landers, is there anything wrong with getting into the habit of kissing a lot of people?
A. Charley Weaver: It got me out of the army.
Q. It is the most abused and neglected part of your body, what is it?
A. Paul Lynde: Mine may be abused, but it certainly isn't neglected.
Q. Back in the old days, when Great Grandpa put horseradish on his head, what was he trying to do?
A. George Gobel: Get it in his mouth.
Q. Who stays pregnant for a longer period of time, your wife or your elephant?
A. Paul Lynde: Who told you about my elephant?
Q. When a couple have a baby, who is responsible for its sex?
A. Charley Weaver: I'll lend him the car, the rest is up to him.
Q. Jackie Gleason recently revealed that he firmly believes in them and has actually seen them on at least two occasions. What are they?
A. Charley Weaver: His feet.
Q. According to Ann Landers, what are two things you should never do in bed?
A. Paul Lynde: Point and laugh.
I remember watching this program with my mother when I was a child. Of course I was to young to understand most of the humor and I loved the fact the show made my mother laugh out loud (which was a rare occurrence).
I hope all of you have a safe and happy weekend! Comments are always appreciated
Labels: misc
N Posted by Rain at 11/24/2006 11:47:00 PM
2
comments from:
jedimerc,
,
N Posted by Rain at 11/22/2006 06:45:00 AM
5
comments from:
Politically Homeless,
jedimerc,
Lyndon,
,
Rain,
Well I hope this brings a Monday morning smile to you, Geoffe!
Labels: Monday's Glamour
N Posted by Rain at 11/20/2006 12:21:00 AM
7
comments from:
jedimerc,
josh a. cagan,
jules,
,
Rain,
,
Eric,
Name... Rain
From... West Coast, United States
I am a strong, sexy, intelligent, candid and loving woman who would do anything for her family. I am a mother of two.I have a sarcastic sense of humor,love to read and I am trying to stay positive in a difficult world.This is the place that I will use to perserve my sanity on the path that is called my life.
"Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity.It can turn a mealinto a feast, a house into a home,a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today and creates a vision for tomorrow.~Melody Beattie
Click on photo to see larger version.
| History | [−] |
