You seem more erratic now, for your emotions are very close to the surface. You are likely showing more of yourself than you even realize, and the sudden shifts are reflected in not-so-subtle ways as quickly as your moods change. It's not necessary to be in total control. Try letting those close to you know that you are moving through some rough waters and could use their support. Well no shit!
As many of you know, Rusty was offered a deal with the District Attorneys office and on advice of his lawyer he turned the deal down.
Three weeks ago my father and I met with his lawyer for a strategy meeting. During lunch we were informed that there is new DNA evidence against Rusty and his co-defendant on a new charge.
Son of a bitch.
Two days later I received a letter from Rusty and enclosed was a letter from our local school district congratulating him for scoring in the top five in the districts GED test. They are giving him the Outstanding Achievement Award for 2006. They asked him to provide a biography about himself and to remember to include a recent picture of himself so he can inspire people of all ages who have not completed high school.
I wonder if I can get a copy of his latest mug shot from our local Sheriffs department?
My father is going to make sure that the judge gets a copy of his award. He feels it is important because “It shows the judge that at least Rusty has accomplished something during his time in jail”. Also, my dad wants me to take out a one hundred fifty thousand dollar mortgage on my home so I can hire a new lawyer for his grandson. Dad just wants to hug him again before he passes away.
I swear if I could touch Rusty I would slap him silly. Before you ask, no I have NEVER hit my children. Looking back I probably should have spanked him and I really have no way of knowing if that would have changed anything in Rusty's future.
Two weeks ago I went to visit my son and I noticed a blue line on Rusty’s forearm. When I asked him about it he laughed and said he is going to have Father Time tattooed on his arm. The next day I received a phone call from his lawyer letting me know that Rusty was in the hole. Apparently they did a search while the prisoners were out on the yard and they found a weapon in his bunk. Of course Rusty is denying that it was his weapon and he has told us that it was planted by someone else. My father has bought into his story, hook, line and sinker.
Have I mentioned that Stucco Man, Rusty’s dad is in complete denial about the trouble our son is in? He sees nothing, hears nothing and speaks nothing. Stucco Man is under the misguided impression that because California’s Prison System is over crowded and badly in need of reform, his son will most likely be given probation. If this happens you will be able to find me at the local insane asylum, third floor bed 2B.
My plate is really full and I am having trouble balancing everything in my life right now. I want to take this time to thank all of you for your understanding with my lack of posting. I have not forgotten you Jules and I will post your interview questions as soon as I gain some perspective. Also Laine, are you inside my head? Your last three posts have hit so close to home, thanks for helping me put a finger on my own thoughts concerning my personal life.
I am a strong, sexy, intelligent, candid and loving woman who would do anything for her family. I am a mother of two.I have a sarcastic sense of humor,love to read and I am trying to stay positive in a difficult world.This is the place that I will use to perserve my sanity on the path that is called my life.
"Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity.It can turn a mealinto a feast, a house into a home,a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today and creates a vision for tomorrow.~Melody Beattie