N Posted by Rain at 4/25/2006 10:18:00 AM
MG posted at 12:02 AM
Oh darling girl,
I identified so acutely with this post, I too am a fixer. My therapist and I have concluded that it is half my problem with my life...apparently fixers take on the world's problems, often at detriment to themselves.
Do you find you put people's needs before yours more often than not?
Sometimes it is so difficult to put yourself first, realistically you are breaking the habit of a lifetime. I am doing exactly what you are doing now and maybe you feel the same, but I am feeling a lot of guilt - like I am letting people down by not being there for them in every single conceivable aspect.
To make the conscious decision to stop taking the weight of the world on your shoulders is empowering but damn hard to both implement then sustain - you know what though? It does actually get easier!! And you will see the positive results in yourself.
I am coping with life a lot better now, I read a good article that said a good approach to life is to sort your 'problems/stresses' into two piles - ones you can deal with and ones you can't do anything about - and you deal with what you can change - that way you will get positive results and it will motivate you to keep going in this good direction.
Rain posted at 1:31 AM
MG...Thanks for stopping by!
It is nice to know that I am not alone.
I am for anything that will help me stay positive...I am going to start making my piles tonight! ~Rain